Note: edited very early Friday morning. I can never sleep when I'm hosting a party...
Right now I'm very busy. I have had people ask me to recondition antique furniture in time to show off for their guests, which gives me spending money for Florida but keeps me with permanently red and ugly hands. I am in charge of the company holiday party again, and we have end-of-year paperwork. So if I'm not a very good blogger or blogfriend, that's why. Sorry.
I am thinking a little bit, though.
When most of us were going to school, we learned that pandas are "solitary" creatures. The National Zoo's Mei Xiang (mama bear) and Tian Tian (papa bear) didn't attend those classes, so perhaps they can be forgiven for their ignorance. Snow apparently works just like panda-nip. Like everything else for the past year, they enjoy it all the more when they can enjoy it together.
(Picture taken by RoxandaBear last week.)
We have to unlearn so much of what we've learned. Unlearning is as important as learning, I think, and it's so much harder. Science is unraveling and reteaching so much right now. We thought pandas were solitary, but now we see they're quite social when the food supply is stable enough to allow it. We thought there were nine planets in our solar system, and Pluto was one of them. We thought prehistory was all about big, toothy dinosaurs, when actually there were many smaller creatures, including what were apparently big penguins. We thought carbon was the basis for all life. We learn, we unlearn, we learn again, and it's a bit disorienting, but so exciting!
I pointed out all last year that Juan Pablo Montoya, the Colombian who came to NASCAR from Formula One racing, not only had to learn NASCAR this first year, but had to unlearn attitudes and tricks from Formula One, and all in a second language! Goddamn right he deserved Rookie of the Year!
I know at work, unlearning is so much of the process. I've had to unlearn Wendy's techniques to work at McDonald's, 7-Eleven techniques to work at Eckerd's, my last job's methods for this job (which is only similar on paper), and, it seems, a computer program and copier every year. That's part of the tsimmis we're dealing with at my office right now.
You have to walk right up to the devil you don't know and shake hands sometimes. The alternative is taking piles of shit from the devil you do know, over and over again. L'Ailee is despairing over her countrypeople doing this in Russia. Putin's kept a tight hold on to his power, term limits be damned. She's so conflicted--she's glad to be here and wishes she could be there to help, all at once. She's been e-mailing her family in Russia, as well as a couple people she e-met while playing chess online, a lot. (Yes, she is an ardent admirer of Garry Kasparov.) I really don't know how to help, except just to listen and hug and abstain from teasing her. It is the most surreal thing--I was going to give her a vampire bat "adoption" complete with plush animal from the World Wildlife Fund as one of her Solstice gifts, because she loves bats. I gave her the little guy now, as a desperate attempt to cheer her up. She likes it, at least. I'm not conflicted at all. I'm glad she's here and not there!
As a bisexual woman (me) and a lesbian (her), we have dealt so much with lesbians who think that all bisexual women are just going to up and leave women for men. They nag me to "choose sides," as if my looking at Tony Stewart that way takes anything away from L'Ailee or from them. They tell L'Ailee to prepare to have her heart broken. I'm not going to go into another closet, after all the effort it took to extricate myself from the Assemblies of God church, and L'Ailee doesn't feel threatened by men. Really, I think the idea is insulting to lesbians, like any male co-worker or pizza boy or wino on the street is so much more irresistable to bi women than any lesbian. Shit, can't that nonsense be left to the homophobes!?!?
Well, after we enjoyed a brief break from that line of bullshit, Jasmyne Cannick came up with more, and commenters just kept piling on. I particularly "enjoyed" a top ten list of reasons not to date bisexuals, which only really revealed the commenter's insecurity. (To be completely fair, Cannick gave a bisexual woman, N. D. Smith, a chance to rebut earlier this week.) Kathy Belge of About.com Lesbian Life approvingly linked to the original post, saying this is a "necessary" conversation.
Maybe for her it is. Maybe for Cannick and her commenters, it is. From where I sit, I think that "conversation" can't be over soon enough. One thing L'Ailee and I often say to it is that we're grateful we met as kids. We'd have had to unlearn so, so much if we had met later in life.
Maybe Tila Tequila doesn't help my cause. Or maybe she actually *does*! :-)
If you're celebrating later this month, you still have time to adopt a critter from WWF and get that stuffed animal! A plethora of choices ranging from the obvious and beautiful panda to bonobos for the militant bisexual to meerkats for the friend who cried when Flower died to hellbender salamanders for anyone who would love that name!
Maybe next year, you can adopt a jerboa!
The more the Clinton campaign keeps talking, the prouder I'll be to vote for Obama.
Mitt Romney's true attitudes about religion
Generation X--the un-sexiest generation ever? I don't know; I seem to recall having some fun!